Beyond the Honeymoon: Navigating the Culture Shock Phase of a New Role

You’ve landed the job. You’ve met the team, survived the onboarding schedule, and are starting to find your rhythm. But around the three-month mark, something unexpected happens: the honeymoon is over.

This is what I call the culture shock phase of starting a new role. It sneaks up on you just as you're starting to get your head around the basics. The new-job energy fades, the cracks and complexities of the organisation start to show, and you realise just how much you still don’t know. At the same time, expectations start to ramp up. You’re no longer “new” — but you don’t yet feel confident or fully equipped to deliver.

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. This in-between stage is one of the most common pain points I see in leadership onboarding. And the good news? There are some simple, practical things you can do to navigate it well.

Set Mini Objectives and Milestones
Instead of aiming to “crack the role,” narrow your focus to a few clear, short-term wins. These mini goals create structure when everything feels a bit unstructured. They also build momentum and confidence.

Ask yourself:

- What are 2–3 outcomes I want to achieve this month?
- How do these connect to what success looks like in this role?

Make Your Plan Visible
Once you’ve got your objectives, share them. Whether it’s your manager, a mentor, or a peer, having someone in the loop keeps you aligned with expectations and gives you a sounding board.

It also shows initiative — a subtle but powerful way to build trust during this phase.

Keep Connecting the Dots
When you’re new, one of your most important jobs is learning how things really work — not just on paper, but in practice. Systems, relationships, influence pathways — they’re often invisible unless you go looking.

Make it a goal to talk to at least one new person each week. Be curious. Ask how they see the business, where they sit in the ecosystem, and what advice they have for someone new. Over time, these conversations will help you build context, credibility, and culture fluency.

Start Noticing the Politics (Without Getting Sucked In)
Around this time, you’ll likely start to see the real power structures at play — who influences decisions, how trust is built, where resistance lives, and which relationships really matter. This is normal, and it’s not a sign of dysfunction — every workplace has politics.

The key here is observation over judgement. Rather than diving into the fray, step back and watch. Who gets listened to? How do decisions really get made? Who do people turn to for a quiet sense-check? This awareness gives you the lay of the land and helps you navigate without stepping on landmines.

You don’t need to play politics — but you do need to understand them.

Ask the “Dumb” Questions
You might feel pressure to perform, but resist the urge to pretend you’ve got it all figured out. Now is the time to ask all the questions — especially the ones that feel basic.

People are far more forgiving in your first 6 months than they will be in year two, so make the most of it. Clarity beats assumption every time.

Watch for the Drift
In this phase, it’s common to drift — away from the things you said you’d focus on, away from how you wanted to show up.

Keep checking in with yourself:

- Am I spending time on the right things?
- Am I still showing up in a way that’s true to how I want to lead?

Leadership is as much about course-correction as it is about direction.

Look After Yourself
Lastly — and this is big — don’t underestimate how mentally and emotionally taxing this transition can be. If you’re feeling tired or low in confidence, it’s not a sign you’re not cut out for the job. It’s a sign you’re human, and adapting.

Create time for rest. Get outside. Move your body. Talk to someone who gets it. You’ll make better decisions when your system is regulated.

The culture shock phase doesn’t last forever — but it’s a crucial moment.
With a bit of structure, support, and self-awareness, you can move through it with purpose and set yourself up to thrive in the long term.